Formational book review by Megan

3/5 stars

“…but the worst that could have happened was also already behind him; the thing not done, which could have been – which he would have had to live with for the rest of his life.”

Small Things Like These is about a man named Bill Furlong and what he does when confronted with injustice and his own experiences in his past. He is forced to make a decision that involves self-censorship and the town turning a blind eye that may rock the boat more than he wants.

**A few general spoilers are below.**

Reading as a Disciple

“What was it all for? Furlong wondered. The work and the constant worry. […] Lately, he had begun to wonder what mattered, apart from Eileen and the girls. He was touching forty but didn’t feel himself to be getting anywhere or making any kind of headway and could not but sometimes wonder what the days were for.”

Worry. It seeps into the mundane moments of the day, the busy, hectic times and in our sleep. It can disrupt and upend your day in a moment. I recently woke up actually feeling rested (rare as a mom of littles) and the morning was beautiful with the sun shining but after a simple chance comment on finances, the morning suddenly didn’t seem so bright. We all can spiral into gloom and despair if we don’t consciously choose to look to God for hope and joy.

This book showed how worry can invade otherwise joyful seasons and disrupt your life but it also showed that we often do have to make difficult choices, that our worry can be the stress of having to make a difficult decision. We can’t hide from those times and many times they are unavoidable but God promises to be with us and we do not have to make them alone. Furlong was alone in the book, it seemed even his own family wanted nothing to do with the decision he was faced with but God will be with us and will give us the wisdom needed. Keegan wanted to bring as much separation between God and Furlong as possible since the church was the antagonist in the story but what you are left with is loneliness and hopelessness.

Reading Communally

“…he found himself asking was there any point in being alive without helping one another? Was it possible to carry on along through all the years, the decades, through an entire life, without once being brave enough to go against what was there and yet call yourself a Christian, and face yourself in the mirror?”

We’ve got one life to live, one chance at life. You can sleep in the grave. God needs you to help save as many people as possible.

These are things I’ve heard or been told to bring an urgency to my Christian walk. I never liked this line of thought, as if it was our responsibility alone to “save” someone from the fires of hell. We are not the ones doing the saving first of all and furthermore, are not our days for bringing glory to our creator and simply pointing others to His glory? While there may be some level of urgency in sharing Christ with those around us, I don’t see evidence of a need for hurry in the Bible. Christ did not gallop from town to town sharing the Good News, he walked. While we might be tempted to think we have “one chance” to share Christ with someone, God is always working, with or without us.

While it is easy to take on an individualistic approach to the Great Commission, we must remember that we are part of a greater picture and that God is continually moving and working whether we join in His work or not. We are invited to join the greater body of Christ in His work to make all things new and to redeem what was lost.

Final Thoughts

“Before long, he caught a hold of himself and concluded that nothing ever did happen again; to each was given days and chances which wouldn’t come back around. And wasn’t it sweet to be where you were and let it remind you of the past for once, despite the upset, instead of always looking on into the mechanics of the days and the trouble ahead, which might never come.”

Overall, not my cup of tea. I would call it an “inspirational” depressing story. In the end, it’s all about “the thing not done,” to live with no regrets, but somehow, this story just left you feeling sad and depressed. I wasn’t quite into Keegan’s style of writing either. There was something lacking in this story and I think it came down to hope. Hope was placed in man; me, myself, and I, and it was only a faint glimmer anyways. You’re left wondering if there really was any hope. The problem is that our hope will fall flat if we look to man for saving, hope can only be found in Christ and Christ alone. This book was a great reminder of that. What is especially gloomy about this though, is that it is the church that was the source of pain and evil. So sad that this story is based on true events. We, as the church body, must do better.

Other books:

Claire Keegan has written several other books; you can look them up by her name, but I’m not sure I will be in a hurry to read any more of her books.

Formational book review by Megan

3.5/5 stars

“The law is important, Mex. Society cannot function without it.”
            “What if the law is wrong?”
            “What if the heart is wrong?”

Nowhere Boy is a story of a Syrian refugee in Belgium. He finds a cellar to hide in but is discovered by an American boy and the story follows their journey toward friendship and freedom. Marsh’s story compares the true story of a Belgian hiding a Jewish boy and addresses topics of when to disobey the law, or parents, smuggling, lying, and authority.

Reading as a Disciple

“What mattered wasn’t who you were. It was who you could be.”

Max is an American boy who has come to Belgium for a year with his family. He feels lost and alone in a place unfamiliar and struggles with his own identity, constantly comparing himself to his sister who seems to have it together. The book centers around finding your identity by helping and serving others. This is a great idea and one many people teach and strive for. But is that where we find our identity?

As disciples of Christ, our identity must come from Christ alone. It is not something I can choose and create out of my own liking. That would be a humanist perspective and what the rest of the world preaches; half of Disney movies are centered around this idea. What matters is that we look to God for identity, not our own aspirations.

Reading Communally

“People were always weighing their suffering against others’, not using it to form bonds.”

What if we were able to connect with others who are also suffering? When we are in the midst of the valley of despair we don’t usually think about others’ pain but this quote reminds us to set that aside and still move to connect with people and perhaps in that season of pain you can find a friend and person to lean on. Isolation is a friend of pain and it truly takes effort to not hide away from others when we are suffering.

Max was lost, without purpose, searching for his identity. He found purpose in helping Ahmed, if that was the right purpose can be left up to debate, but despite his decisions in helping Ahmed, it can still be said that he had the “courage to listen.” Something that many struggle with today, listening to those in pain, but it takes courage to stop our busy schedules to listen to what others have to say in the midst of their despair.

Final Thoughts

            Overall a great book but I would recommend it to be read in a group, not necessarily for individual reading. There are so many topics to unpack and discuss: disobeying parents, when is it ok break the law, immigration policies, smuggling, authority, lying… It’s a good starting point for discussion on many topics but doesn’t go in depth when it might have been nice. The low rating was because the main character isn’t relatable or likable; it took a while to get into the book. It still has something to offer for YA readers.

Other books:

The Lost Year (on my to-be-read pile, story involves Ukraine!)

The Night Tourist

The Door by the Staircase

*I have not read any of the above books.

See post on Everything Sad is Untrue for other books on immigrants and refugees.

Formational book review by Megan

4/5 stars

“People are slowly dying everywhere,” he said. “They are also continuously living. Every moment they draw breath, they can find the glory I put here on Earth, if they look for it.”

The Stranger in the Lifeboat looks at how the help we pray for may not come in the form we expect or want. When a luxury yacht sinks, a group of people in a lifeboat naturally pray for rescue but are surprised when they pull someone in that claims to be the Lord.

Reading as a Disciple

“I am here Benjamin,” he said. “Whenever you wish to talk.”

            How do I view Christ in the moments when I want help? I know I can so easily fall into the view of God as a vending machine that I come to when I need something and I just have to put in the right “amount” to get what I want. Some may have the same thought as a few characters in the story, “A group of shipwrecked people think they have God in the boat? Why not pin him down? Hold Him accountable for all the horrors He allowed in this world?” The Stranger in the Lifeboat takes a common habit or thought and turns it upside down. Christ is always near waiting for us. It is a simple thought to come to Jesus daily, not for anything specific but simply for conversation, relationship.

The story brought a simple reminder of the relationship that God desires with us and is so easy for us to join in.

Reading Communally

“… what we yearn for most is comfort.”

The story mainly follows two characters, each of whom need rescuing in different forms. The overarching story begs the question, “how do we help others?” How do we as believers, offer help and hope to the people around us? This is sometimes easy to answer but less easy to act upon. How do you help a man like Jarty in the story, an inspector who lost a child years ago and has been distant and lost since? Or someone like Benji, who is bent upon revenge, formed by hatred? It is easy to see someone struggling to carry groceries and think you can “help” them by carrying their load but it is a whole different ball game if help involves those who don’t know they need help or perhaps don’t want your help. Help does not have to come in concrete scheduled forms, as Albom brings to life in the book. Being close to others in their grief and frustration, despair and hatred, is part of living in a fallen world, living in the body of Christ. Being a shoulder to cry on is actually uncomfortable for most people, especially when you don’t know the person well. We want to do something concrete but simply being present in someone’s life is the most help we can offer.

Final Thoughts

“Those moments are a gift. But their end is not a punishment. I am never cruel, Benjamin. I know you before you are born, I know you after you die. My plans for you are not defined by this world. Beginnings and endings are earthly ideas. I go on. And because I go on, you go with me. Feeling loss is part of why you are on Earth. Through it, you appreciate the brief gift of human existence, and you learn to cherish the world I created for you.”

The book was an enjoyable read and kept my attention. It was beautifully laid out and organized in a way that did not give away the story but kept you reading. This could easily be a book club read or at least a book to read with a friend. There is plenty to discuss and compare and contrast. I did not give it 5 stars as the ending got a little muddled and confusing; there was a switch in thinking that had to happen, which took away from the story.

Other Mitch Albom books:

Tuesdays with Morrie

The Little Liar

The Five People You Meet in Heaven

Formational book review by Megan

2/5 stars

“Maybe she has a brother.”
“Right. Sure. How do you know she has a brother?”
“How do you know she doesn’t have a brother?”
“Whatever. She probably doesn’t. Who hugs a brother?”
“I bet you she was just really sad. Maybe the Dud still hasn’t called her.”
“Whatever. Or she’s a slut.”
“How come you don’t like that girl…”
[…]
“Windy, all the girls here are sluts.”
“It’s just that that’s kind of… that’s kind of sexist.”

So first off, I don’t’ recommend this book. The only reason it is not 1 star is for the beautiful artwork. It is truly a story-telling masterpiece but the rest is… less than to be desired. I read it because it was listed as ‘if you liked Everything Sad is Untrue, you will like this book.’ False.

Disclaimer: This story has mature story elements of homosexuality, sex, attempted suicide, and strong language.

It’s set up as a classic coming of age story. Rose and her family go to the beach every summer but this summer is a bit different. Rose and her friend Windy get involved in some local love drama and Rose is juggling her own family drama. How does it all resolve?

**Spoilers below**

Reading as a Disciple

“Its because you always have to have everything YOUR way. You’re making everything sad. I bet you’re still trying to have a baby. Dad doesn’t even want one you know.”
“Rose that’s not-“
“Dad’s happy with just me. You don’t even want to be happy.”

One of the things that I didn’t like about this book was the insensitive dysfunctional relationship between the parents and their daughter Rose. This conversation proves just that. While some may say “that’s what real life is like, its just showing a real relationship between parents and their soon-to-be teenage daughter,” I don’t believe we need to have more examples of a dysfunctional family, we need stories that show hope for something more. This story leaves one feeling empty and hopeless. While there were many conversations, where I just wanted to say, “talk about it!” “tell her what happened!,” it was easy to see the shame that pervaded their lives and prevented honest conversations. Shame was a dark cloud over the family’s beach vacation that went on into their everyday lives. You feel the tension in Rose as she doesn’t understand and avoids hearing more from her parents. It is painful to see that her confusion and misunderstanding comes out in anger toward her mom and the girl Jenny. Her emotions are misplaced and jumbled up, it is important to keep in mind that God does not shy away from messy emotions and dysfunctional relationships. The Bible clearly shows many dysfunctional families being used for great things.

Reading Communally

“Who’s a slut?’
“No one!”
“Bit strange calling someone you don’t even know a slut.”
“Oh, well, these guys who knew these girls were calling them sluts.”
“Well, how is that okay?”

The story is clear that parenting needs to happen but because Rose’s parents are struggling in their own relationship; they’ve forgotten to care for their daughter. Rose’s mom declares, “I’m a zombie. I have these crazy thoughts. Like, I wish. I wish I was a little kid. So I could just scream and be mad. Its terrible to say, but I wish I could just… disappear.” She’s absent at a critical time in her daughter’s life. Everyone experiences times where they just want to disappear, be like Homer Simpson and melt into the hedge. But life continues on. Thinking communally, we need to be able to help those that are struggling. To come alongside and not be afraid of the cloud of shame that may hang over a person.

Windy was a good friend and was able to communicate to Rose several things but unfortunately, Rose didn’t handle the confrontation well. We need good friends to act as dissenting voices in our lives, people who will speak truth in love, even when we don’t respond in love. Especially as kids are turning into adults, they need someone to love them through their questions and offer gentle course correction.

Final Thoughts

The most frustrating part of this book is that nothing is resolved, there was no hope at the end. Usually a coming of age story includes a lesson that was learned, the protagonist is confronted with their ignorance and manages to gather their self-revelation into a new understanding of life and who they are. That doesn’t happen here. Rose never learns why her mom is emotionally absent and doesn’t want to swim, her and Windy never really make up, and Rose still holds her beliefs about Jenny to be true. The story ends there with Rose simply learning to stuff her emotions, not trust her parents and to drown her sorrows and confusion in R-rated movies. The organization of the story was brilliant though, so many parallels between the Jenny girl and Rose’s mom, the R-rated movies and the story of their lives, it was genius, just terrible content. There are better books out there.  

Other books:

I can’t recommend any books by the Tamaki cousins. Based on reading reviews and book overviews, they are full of similar themes.

Formational Book Review by Megan

5/5 stars

“How can you explain why you believe anything? So I just say what my mom says when people ask her. She looks them in the eye with the begging hope that they’ll hear her and she says, ‘because it’s true.’

            Why else would she believe it?

            It’s true and it’s more valuable than seven million dollars in gold coins, and thousands of acres of Persian countryside, and ten years of education to get a medical degree, and all your family, and a home, and the best cream puffs of Jolfa, and even maybe your life.

            My mom wouldn’t have made the trade otherwise.

            If you believe it’s true, that there is a God and He wants you to believe in Him and He sent His Son to die for you- then it has to take over your life. It has to be worth more than everything else, because heaven’s waiting on the other side.”

Everything Sad is Untrue is a beautiful story of an Iranian family that fled to Oklahoma. The story is told in the style of 1001 Arabian Nights and from the perspective of the author as a twelve-year-old boy. Nayeri weaves the story from his great-grandparents to himself, into one tale of strength and belonging.

Reading as a Disciple

“There are gods all over the world who just want you to express yourself. Look inside and find whatever you think you are and that’s all it takes to be good. And there are gods who are so alien to us, with minds so clear, the only thing to do would be to sit at their feet and wait for them to speak, to tell us what is good.

A god who listens is love.

A god who speaks is law.

[…]

Love is empty without justice.

Justice is cruel without love.”

Mercy and justice are two topics that can actually be divisive. It’s been on personality tests, “which is more important, mercy or justice?” as if you can only show one or the other but not a mix. Americans tend to be more focused on justice, what is right or wrong. It is not always so easy though. God is the perfect mix; he shows perfect justice and absolute love. Nayeri writes of how this is blended and brings it all together with “I think He’s a God who listens as if we are his most important children, and I think He speaks to tell us so.” When we have experienced an injustice, we want justice. When we have experienced hate, we need love. God sees the big picture and knows the best timing for what we want and who needs what.

“Why should anybody live with their head down? Besides, the only way to stop believing something is to deny it yourself. To hide it. To act as if it hasn’t changed your life.” God’s love has changed our lives because he showed us mercy when he should have shown us justice. It is good to read a story of persecution to be reminded of the price that has been paid. “She wanted everybody to have what she had, to be free, to realize that in other religions you have rules and codes and obligations to follow to earn good things, but all you had to do with Jesus was believe he was the one who died for you.” Such a great summary of the Gospel and simple reminder to readers of what our faith is all about.

Reading Communally

            “A patchwork memory is the shame of a refugee.”

Refugees are also another difficult topic for Americans to address. This book was full of evidence of that, believers and unbelievers alike. How can we welcome the foreigner? Everything Sad is Untrue has many stories of how Nayeri’s family endured the switch to living in the states, unfortunately, so many stories of how they were not welcomed. Empathy may never be achieved but we can still show sympathy for those that are in a new land, different from their own, having to relearn simple tasks such as grocery shopping and even using a toilet.

“Sometimes when you’re a refugee, you have to give up the dignity you’d have if you said, ‘you know what, thank you, but no thank you. Your son treats my son like a dog, and your daughter says, ‘ew,’ if we get near her, and we appreciate how smiley you are, but we’ll figure out some other way to attend school.”

As believers, we shouldn’t force newcomers to give up their dignity but instead treat each person we meet with dignity and respect. Each individual holds intrinsic value because they are imago dei, the image of God. Everything Sad is Untrue tells many stories of how some people may perceive something but actually there is so much more going on. We do not know the whole story for each person we meet. We must rely on God to fill in the gaps of knowledge between us and give grace to each other. As Episcopal priest Timothy Jones wrote in an article for Rabbit Room, “we are persons made to flourish through the affection and presence of others.” We are not meant to be alone.

Final Thoughts

            I loved this book because, while I am most definitely not a refugee, I sometimes feel like a foreigner in my native land and can identify with some of the sentiment expressed by Nayeri. We have taught our kids what imago Dei means and work to instill in them that each person is made in the image of God and therefore their life is valuable. This lesson becomes real when we meet someone different from us; refugees are an easy example. This book was refreshing in not only how it was written but also the story of hope and resilience.

Also by Daniel Nayeri:

The Many Assassinations of Samir, Seller of Dreams

Other books on refugees:

Somalia- When Stars Are Scattered by Omar Mohamed

“In a refugee camp, you are always reminded of the things you have lost. It is a valiant and agonizing struggle to focus not on what you have lost… but on what you have been given.”

Vietnam- Inside Out and Back Again by Thanha Lai

Syria- Nowhere Boy by Katherine Marsh

*Have not read any of these books… yet. (Two are on my bedside table)

(Update: Finished When Stars Are Scattered June 17)

(Update: Finished Inside Out and Back Again July 4)

(Update: Finished Nowhere Boy September 8, read my thoughts on it HERE.)